If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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