It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
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so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
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