So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
