This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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