Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize