This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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