You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
No stitches, just platelets and will power
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
