So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight