you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
