Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize