Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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