he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
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He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
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Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize