i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
And then the night went full on bisexual.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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