Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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