Texts From Last Night

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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.

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  (910): no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender. http://tfl.nu/cz6b
  Replies (16) Good night (596) Bad night (1871)
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  (347): View more from New York

  i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours

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  (347): i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours http://tfl.nu/3wc8
  Replies (33) Good night (4367) Bad night (1736)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'

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  (917): well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv' http://tfl.nu/bicf
  Replies (49) Good night (11089) Bad night (812)
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  (805): View more from California

  he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me

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  (805): he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me http://tfl.nu/6q8m
  Replies (18) Good night (661) Bad night (4025)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.

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  (850): I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math. http://tfl.nu/a930
  Replies (68) Good night (5094) Bad night (752)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.

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  (702): you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly. http://tfl.nu/rajr
  Replies (11) Good night (4086) Bad night (864)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME

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  (802): the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME http://tfl.nu/i706
  Replies (51) Good night (648) Bad night (6878)
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  (559): View more from California

  I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"

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  (559): I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face" http://tfl.nu/zv08
  Replies (18) Good night (1107) Bad night (5653)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.

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  (573): officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street. http://tfl.nu/ajuf
  Replies (12) Good night (3325) Bad night (1130)
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  (619): View more from California

  He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.

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  (619): He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy. http://tfl.nu/8ucs
  Replies (14) Good night (1117) Bad night (5173)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going

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  (513): My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going http://tfl.nu/twm1
  Replies (7) Good night (915) Bad night (4643)
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  (845): View more from New York

  When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"

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  (845): When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine" http://tfl.nu/u1m0
  Replies (23) Good night (1200) Bad night (3762)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Your blankets are not drunk friendly

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  (706): Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving (706): Your blankets are not drunk friendly http://tfl.nu/10kf
  Replies (2) Good night (829) Bad night (1059)
• Favorite

  (228): View more from Mississippi

  I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  probably "functioning vagina, must touch"

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  (228): I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her? (601): probably "functioning vagina, must touch" http://tfl.nu/w791
  Replies (4) Good night (1447) Bad night (557)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.

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  (239): Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows. http://tfl.nu/ni5n
  Replies (7) Good night (520) Bad night (293)

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