News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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