He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
