yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.