ADVERTISEMENT

• (208): View more from Idaho

  And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you

  Fav 15 3416 1055

  share tweet
  

• (417): View more from Missouri

  you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up

  Fav 14 3605 2013

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.

  Fav 7 4330 1080

  share tweet
  

• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"

  Fav 10 5643 1412

  share tweet
  
• 

  29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (870): View more from Arkansas

  I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.

  Fav 15 4964 1783

  share tweet
  

• (214): View more from Texas

  The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.

  Fav 1 2301 1051

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (512): View more from Texas

  Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me

  Fav 19 1542 1305

  share tweet
  

• (773): View more from Illinois

  Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.

  Fav 8 1671 767

  share tweet
  

• (425): View more from Washington

  Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.

  Fav 1 1773 703

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (505): View more from New Mexico

  I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence

  (1-505): View more from New Mexico

  That sucks

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!

  Fav 2 906 538

  share tweet
  

• (208): View more from Idaho

  He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.

  Fav 1 538 704

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (904): View more from Florida

  GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.

  Fav 1 730 379

  share tweet
  

• (419): View more from Ohio

  Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.

  Fav 5 698 518

  share tweet
  

• (210): View more from Texas

  I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer

  Fav 2 429 585

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (727): View more from Florida

  They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos

  Fav 2 279 166

  share tweet
  

Randomize