either way he was missing a nipple.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
