So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
