oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize
