I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
