I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
