even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
