i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
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I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
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don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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