how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
As shirtless as possible
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
