So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize