how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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