I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Randomize
