I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize