I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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