theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
