And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
You're a waste of cheezeits
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
