Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
