Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize