I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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