You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize