Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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