My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
