No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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