from now on my penis is your penis
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
