In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
