Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
