it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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