hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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