party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
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