so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
