That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
