I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
