wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
