do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
