We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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