new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Randomize
