just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
